Associate Name: Patrick Padden
Main Advisor and OP Reviewer: Jennifer Dauksha-English

Output Packet #:  	6	Year: Capstone MSc
Date Submitted: December 12th, 2014 - second submission January 7th, 2015
Date Reviewed: December 19th, 2014 - second review January 9th, 2015
Mark: 74
Grade: B
Time Spent on Review: 3.75 hrs + 0.75 hrs second review (see comments at very bottom)

Dear Patrick,

I finished reviewing your OP and in many ways I was very pleased. However, I must return it to you as incomplete. You included all of the required elements though I feel the content is yet inadequate for an MSc level degree. I would like you to take a few more hours and add a few more reflections and then resubmit to me asap. Based on the grade you gave yourself, I imagine that this might be unexpected. I know its the holiday season and you may be quite busy - please do your best to move this process forward by completing these steps.

I was honestly surprised by how high you graded yourself, especially in the design section. At present I'd grade your OP at about a 71, whereas you gave yourself an 86. That's quite a discrepancy. 

Required next step: 
- Commentary section - add a paragraph on pathway management (reflect on tools and decision making processes; time and project mgmt). Also add a section on participation and peer engagement (very explicit tracking of engagement within Gaia U). Add a section on giving, receiving and incorporating feedback (your refinement of this skill flex and talk specifically about OPs and PoDAPO review process). Each of these could be a single paragraph. Also, what about an explicit skill flex tracking from LIPD > present?
- Commentary or Core Report - add a section on your evolution as a designer and discuss the design models you've experimented with over your pathway - even compare and contrast some models. Since you're getting a degree in IESD (design) I find this a must have for your portfolio.
- Core Report - add a reflection on peer, personal, political/patrix outcomes. You have covered project, professional and community. This is relevant to your projects not your pathway (which should be reflected on in commentary). I'd also like for you to summarize at the bottom of this page your overall un/learning patterns.
- PoDAPO - please look at my review of your OP 5 and see how I provided comments for each criteria in the small boxes. What I want from you is just that. I want you to reflect on each criteria. Then in the "additional comments boxes" I want you to comment cumulatively (share how you've engaged with or improved that skill over the past 2-3 years).

Let me know if you have any questions. Please e-mail me to let me know by when you think you can have these tasks completed. Thanks so much!

Cheers,
Jennifer

OP REVIEW-------------------------

1. EVALUATION FORM-------------------- 

(I will send this to you after you resubmit your OP)

2. COMMENTS PER SECTION---------------
Commentary
- Great succinct introduction that summarizes the intention and contents of each section. In the introduction you use the word 'things' and I'd highly suggest you find a new more powerful descriptive word.
- Pathway Reflection - great back story on your pathway before applying for acceleration through to reintegrating with the final project and LR update after being away from Gaia U for 1.5 years. Awesome display of integrity none-the-less! I also appreciate the context around the distinct points in time that you worked on this OP. What i think is missing in this section is a summary on how you made decisions, tools used to manage pathway, etc...
- Love the timeline!  I like the little ribbons - great milestone marker.
- On the transition summary - omg I am really impacted by your journal entry on the seed. That's a beautiful story/imagery/analogy your captured. Awe! I didn't realize the pressure you were under. Well congratulations for moving forward so strategically. I wonder what the analogy would look like if you said seed ball instead of just a seed?
- Beautiful slide show! I wasn't able to see all the pictures though. Maybe my internet was too slow? There might be an error though - check it.
- In the OP Process Reflection, I appreciate the explicit indication of your goals. I like how you created two access points, and combined the LIPD and LR as pathway chunks. Makes sense to me. After reviewing this in more depth - what is missing here for me is 1. a reflection on the actual design process (the design pyramid <which is cool by the way - I'd like to hear more about this> feel more like design sectors rather than a process), and 2. an assessment of whether or not you think that you met these goals that you created for the OP.
- Nice mind map - I especially like the interconnected points. I find it very useful that you shared in detail on the mind mapping process.
- On meta-level learnings, I understand your comment on doing the nitty gritty work and dig the analogy of the telescope.
- Awe - I'm really appreciating the reflection on being a father and how that's linked to your academic pursuit. 
- The piece on invisible structures brings out your values, which have shaped your path. I like the world context woven into personal experience and context. Good integration . Lovely mission - I would make this a statement and bold it at the top of this section. You told me a story about how you changed your viewpoint on asking for money - this would make a great story to include here - perfect example. I get what you're saying about the direction people take. Most of my friends choose directions based on money and I however choose what my heart . However I'm the one who has struggled more financially over the years. I don't at all regret those choices.
- I'm excited for you to hold that MSc degree also!
- Digiphon - would be cool if you also mention here overall digital literacy and skill building.

Report
- Great section summary and notes on navigation.
- For OP1A - great video. I remember watching this when I did your acceleration review. Very inspiring. Nice clarifying update. 
- In OP1B I love your willingness to own words such as, "Fiercely Determined"! A lot of people to not have that level of commitment, courage and inspiration to speak so boldly. I appreciate how you embrace life with such intensity!
- Finding a balance of asserting yourself and accepting feedback/collaborating/going with the dynamic flow is a great edge to be refining. I work a lot with this too. I call it conscious engagement.
- Great summaries for each project OP. As I said in your acceleration review - I'm impressed with the video's included with each OP.  Why did you leave out mention of the previous OP 5 project topic?
- I'm happy to  see that you have a section on community and professional outcomes. What about personal, peer and patrix?

Supporting Evidence
- Excellent annotated resource review. 
- Awesome prezi!
- This table with goals is pretty succinct! Could be even stronger if you explained a bit more on intentions of putting this table together.  It would be cool to see some value metrics. I'm happy to see you have some qualitative and qualitative assessment of tracking these goals in the section on zones. Nicely reflected upon.
- Spelling error last sentence of Process Reflection section "feef"
- Lovely conclusion!

Second Review Notes…
All required next steps listed above in first review have been sufficiently met. Associate resubmitted OP on January 7th, 2015. I reviewed the extra section on January 9th and found them to meet the quality standards for completion of the OP and portfolio as a whole. I've adjusted the grade from an incomplete to what is posted above.